Henrico County VA

Lessons in love

Local couples discuss their relationships




Love conquers all. Well, maybe not all, but when the chemistry is just right, love can overcome lots of obstacles.

We talked with three couples who are living proof that love can conquer a great deal including challenges presented by coming from different cultural or racial backgrounds.

These couples share their stories of love, romance and how they keep the spark alive after years of being together.

Mark Fowlkes and Aimee Wroten
Mark, who is black, and Aimee, who is white, have been together for almost 11 years. The couple (pictured above, upper right) met in West Chester, Pa. and moved to Henrico County about three years ago. They have four daughters. Mark is a talker while Aimee tends to be a little quieter.

How did you meet?
“I was a bouncer in a bar and [Aimee] and a couple of girlfriends came in and I spotted her,” Mark said.

“And he followed me out of the bar,” Aimee said, finishing Mark’s sentence.

They started dating that next week and Mark met her parents soon afterwards.

What first attracted you to each other?
“She loved my muscles,” Mark said. Aimee just smiled as Mark also explained that he was relentless in his pursuit of her. “I wouldn’t let her get away.”

Were there any challenges in the early years of your relationship?
“We had a difference in age,” Mark said. “She had more spunk than I did at the time.” He is 48 and Aimee is 35. “But I like older men,” Aimee reminded Mark.

Mark said that the couple has the everyday challenges that most couples have and they enjoy good spirited discussions now and then.

What’s the spark that keeps you together and keeps the romance alive?
“We have good times together. She is terrible funny. She’s real funny,” Mark said. She admitted, “I don’t act my age.

What’s the most romantic gift either of you has given the other?
“Those four kids,” Mark said as the girls played nearby. “I love them to death. I have older kids, but the best thing she ever gave me was these four kids.”

What advice about love, romance and relationship will you give your children?
“They’re not dating until they’re grown,” she said without hesitation.

“I don’t want my kids to be a part of what society thinks is love,” Mark said. “Society does not have a clue what love is anymore. Most marriages are built on finances and how people look. When you marry or want to spend the rest of your life together with somebody, don’t focus on the outside. Focus on the inside. That’s what I will tell my girls.”

Carlos and Karla Ramos
Carlos, who is Puerto Rican, and Kala Ramos met in her native Honduras. They traveled extensively when he was in the U.S.Army. Now, they live near Hopewell. They have been married 15 years and have a son and a daughter. Carlos is a military analyst for Tapestry Solutions and Karla works for the Virginia Department of Emergency Services.

How did you meet?
We met while Carlos was stationed at the U.S. Embassy in Honduras. A mutual friend invited Carlos, then 28, to a party. Karla, who was 26, attended the party too.

What first attracted you to each other?
“She started playing the piano. That’s what did it,” Carlos said. “I don’t know what she was playing but it was this beautiful music.”

It was three months before they saw each other again. This time it was at a night club.

“I think it was his dancing [that attracted me],” Karla recalls. “We started dancing and we started talking,” Karla said.

“I’m a good dancer,” Carlos bragged.

Were there any challenges in the early years of your marriage?
The two words that describe the couple’s first five years are “adventurous and challenging,” Carlos said.

Carlos was reassigned to Fort Lewis in Washington. Karla said she felt like a fish out of water when she left Honduras to join him. She saw snow for the first time. Karla and Carlos had very different childhoods. She was raised by a single mother in a big city and he grew up in a rural area with his grandparents.

“I was independent, a strong-willed person,” she said. “[His grandparents gave him a] very conservative concept of marriage. I believe in a more equal, 50/50 marriage.”

What’s the spark that keeps you together and keeps the romance alive?
“He’s a funny, funny person. He makes me laugh. And when I’m stressed out for any reason, he can make a face or tell me something and it makes me laugh.”

“She’s beautiful. She is a wonderful person. She understands me. Everything she is sparks my soul every time I see her.”

Karla, what’s the most romantic gift Carlos has given you?
“I’m not really into fancy material presents. I like something original with more meaning than just the item itself. I like useful things. [He wanted] to buy me a diamond necklace or something and I had to educate him that that’s not really my thing.”

What advice about love, romance and relationship have you given your children?
Carlos calls their 15-year old son, David, into the kitchen to answer this question. “He tells me to be respectful to women. Don’t be pushy. Don’t go beyond the boundaries. Don’t disrespect yourself or your lady.”

Darin and Mercedes Branch
Darin, who is white, was raised in Houston and moved to the south side of Richmond in 1998. Mercedes, who is black, is a native of Richmond. The couple (pictured inset, on cover) has been married for seven years and now live in Chesterfield County with their two daughters and son. They own Perception Salon and Spa in Carytown and Darin also is president of Whitewood Solutions, a tax resolution business.

How did you meet?
We met when Darin was a sales manager at a local car dealership. Mercedes was working there as a temporary receptionist before moving to Bowie, Md.

What first attracted you to each other?
“Obviously, looks played a part for both of us,” Mercedes said as she laughed. “The confidence Darin had while selling cars and handling clients made him very attractive to me.”

Darin said he found Mercedes’ “warm personality extremely attractive. We started out as friends as both of us were recently out of relationships. We became close friends with conversations during work and eventually having a friendly relationship after work, which turned into more after Mercedes moved to Maryland.” For about four months, they had a weekend romance. They took turns driving back and forth so they could spend time together. They eventually moved in together here in Virginia.

Along the way, they discovered they each wanted to eventually start and own a business.

“We shared the same dreams of owning a salon and spa. Mercedes did nails and my mother does hair. That dream became reality in 2007 when we opened Perception Salon and Spa.”

Were there any challenges in the early years of your marriage?
“Well, Darin is a Scorpio and he was a little jealous in the early years,” Mercedes said. “He always said that being white and dating a beautiful black woman makes it hard on a white boy since he seemed to always be tested in public.”

What’s the spark that keeps you together and keeps the romance alive?
The couple agree, “We are friends first and that keeps the relationship strong.”

As far as romance goes, they make time to do special things. And Mercedes’ father, a former coach at Armstrong High School, often offers to help. “We are lucky enough to have Coach Samuels who takes the kids every other weekend which allows us to have a date night and a couple’s weekend twice a month,” said Darin, age 31.

Mercedes, what’s the most romantic gift Darin has given you?
“Darin has given me lots of gifts over the years and vice versa from trips to jewelry, but our most precious gifts are our children.”

What advice about love, romance and relationship will you give your children?
“I would have to say to be sure that you find someone who is your friend first and then build on that because if someone can’t respect you as a friend they will never respect you as a lover and it will never last,” said Mercedes, age 33. “At the end of the day, ‘The couple that prays together stays together.’”

This story is part of the Virginia Tapestry: Reflecting Our Rich Diversity series produced by In Your Shoes Media.

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Community

Henrico man to compete in Liberty Mutual Invitational National Finals

Henrico resident Larry Loving, Jr., will compete with three other locals – Thomas Scribner (Richmond), Roscoe McGhee (Midlothian) and Larry Loving (Richmond) in the Liberty Mutual Insurance Invitational National Finals at TPC Sawgrass, in Ponte Vedra Beach, Fla., Feb. 26-Mar. 1. The foursome qualified for the national golf tournament by winning the Liberty Mutual Insurance Invitational, held at Whiskey Creek Golf Club in Ijamsville, Md. on June 11. That event supported the RiteCare Center for Childhood Language Disorders.

In total, 240 amateur golfers will compete in Florida. > Read more.

Henrico PAL recognizes supporters, HSHS athlete


The Henrico Police Athletic League (PAL) held its Sixth Annual Awards Banquet Feb. 5 at The Cultural Arts Center of Glen Allen, celebrating accomplishments of 2014 and recognizing outstanding contributions to the organization. Henrico County Juvenile Domestic Court Judge Denis Soden served as master of ceremonies and former Harlem Globetrotter Melvin Adams served as keynote speaker. 

Among the 2014 honorees were Richmond International Raceway (Significant Supporter), Richmond Strikers Soccer Club (Significant Supporter), Henrico County Schools-Pupil Transportation (Summer Camp Supporter), Bruce Richardson, Jr. (Youth of the Year), Sandra Williams (Volunteer of the Year), Thomas Williams (Employee of the Year), Mikki Pleasants (Board Member of the Year), and Michelle Sheehan (Police Officer of the Year).   > Read more.

‘Fresh Start’ offered for single moms

The Fresh Start For Single Mothers and Their Children Community Outreach Project will host “Necessary Ingredients” on Thursdays from 6 p.m. to 7:30 p.m., beginning Feb. 12 and continuing through May 7, at Velocity Church, 3300 Church Road in Henrico. Dinner and childcare will be provided free of charge.

The program is designed as a fun and uplifting event for single mothers that is designed to provide support, new friendships, encouragement and motivation. Each event will include weekly prizes and giveaways. > Read more.

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Entertainment

Travinia brings contemporary elegance to Willow Lawn


It was another win for Willow Lawn when Travinia Italian Kitchen and Wine Bar opened there six months ago, nestled in the heart of the re-made shopping center. The contemporary American Italian restaurant boasts 13 locations up and down the East Coast, with the Henrico location opening in August.

In the same week, I hit up Travinia twice, once for lunch and once for a late dinner. At lunchtime on a weekday, I was overwhelmed by the smell of garlic and by the number of working professionals in nice suits on their lunch breaks. When we first walked in, I was concerned our meal would be a little too pricey based on the décor – it’s a really nice place. Luckily, the menu has a variety of options for every budget. > Read more.

Soak up the fun

‘SpongeBob’ movie energizes with wit, laughter

There’s a ton of sugar in The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water. Literal sugar, as SpongeBob Squarepants (Tom Kenny) and Patrick (Bill Fagerbakke) inhale their own weight in cotton candy and eat ice cream, one scoop per mouthful.

At one point we burrow into the brain of our boxy yellow hero and discover the inner workings of his brain: googly-eyed cakes and candies that giggle and sing. All of which is extremely appropriate for a film like Sponge Out of Water. Because not only is the movie sweet (the “awwww” kind of sweet), but it’s the equivalent of a 30-candy bar sugar rush, zipping between ideas like a sponge on rocket skates.

The story under all this is really not that complicated. SpongeBob flips burgers at the Krusty Krab. > Read more.

Weekend Top 10


With this last round of snow still fresh on the ground, the best way to start the weekend may be at Southern Season for their weekly wine-tasting program, Fridays Uncorked. Families with cabin fever will enjoy the Richmond Kids Expo, taking place tomorrow at the Richmond Raceway Complex. Some date night options include the Rock & Roll Jubilee at The Cultural Arts Center at Glen Allen, HATTheatre’s production of “The Whale” and National Theatre Live’s “Treasure Island” at the University of Richmond. For all our top picks this weekend, click here! > Read more.

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