Henrico County VA
facebook twitter email rss
Click here
to read
the print edition

Lessons in love

Local couples discuss their relationships




Love conquers all. Well, maybe not all, but when the chemistry is just right, love can overcome lots of obstacles.

We talked with three couples who are living proof that love can conquer a great deal including challenges presented by coming from different cultural or racial backgrounds.

These couples share their stories of love, romance and how they keep the spark alive after years of being together.

Mark Fowlkes and Aimee Wroten
Mark, who is black, and Aimee, who is white, have been together for almost 11 years. The couple (pictured above, upper right) met in West Chester, Pa. and moved to Henrico County about three years ago. They have four daughters. Mark is a talker while Aimee tends to be a little quieter.

How did you meet?
“I was a bouncer in a bar and [Aimee] and a couple of girlfriends came in and I spotted her,” Mark said.

“And he followed me out of the bar,” Aimee said, finishing Mark’s sentence.

They started dating that next week and Mark met her parents soon afterwards.

What first attracted you to each other?
“She loved my muscles,” Mark said. Aimee just smiled as Mark also explained that he was relentless in his pursuit of her. “I wouldn’t let her get away.”

Were there any challenges in the early years of your relationship?
“We had a difference in age,” Mark said. “She had more spunk than I did at the time.” He is 48 and Aimee is 35. “But I like older men,” Aimee reminded Mark.

Mark said that the couple has the everyday challenges that most couples have and they enjoy good spirited discussions now and then.

What’s the spark that keeps you together and keeps the romance alive?
“We have good times together. She is terrible funny. She’s real funny,” Mark said. She admitted, “I don’t act my age.

What’s the most romantic gift either of you has given the other?
“Those four kids,” Mark said as the girls played nearby. “I love them to death. I have older kids, but the best thing she ever gave me was these four kids.”

What advice about love, romance and relationship will you give your children?
“They’re not dating until they’re grown,” she said without hesitation.

“I don’t want my kids to be a part of what society thinks is love,” Mark said. “Society does not have a clue what love is anymore. Most marriages are built on finances and how people look. When you marry or want to spend the rest of your life together with somebody, don’t focus on the outside. Focus on the inside. That’s what I will tell my girls.”

Carlos and Karla Ramos
Carlos, who is Puerto Rican, and Kala Ramos met in her native Honduras. They traveled extensively when he was in the U.S.Army. Now, they live near Hopewell. They have been married 15 years and have a son and a daughter. Carlos is a military analyst for Tapestry Solutions and Karla works for the Virginia Department of Emergency Services.

How did you meet?
We met while Carlos was stationed at the U.S. Embassy in Honduras. A mutual friend invited Carlos, then 28, to a party. Karla, who was 26, attended the party too.

What first attracted you to each other?
“She started playing the piano. That’s what did it,” Carlos said. “I don’t know what she was playing but it was this beautiful music.”

It was three months before they saw each other again. This time it was at a night club.

“I think it was his dancing [that attracted me],” Karla recalls. “We started dancing and we started talking,” Karla said.

“I’m a good dancer,” Carlos bragged.

Were there any challenges in the early years of your marriage?
The two words that describe the couple’s first five years are “adventurous and challenging,” Carlos said.

Carlos was reassigned to Fort Lewis in Washington. Karla said she felt like a fish out of water when she left Honduras to join him. She saw snow for the first time. Karla and Carlos had very different childhoods. She was raised by a single mother in a big city and he grew up in a rural area with his grandparents.

“I was independent, a strong-willed person,” she said. “[His grandparents gave him a] very conservative concept of marriage. I believe in a more equal, 50/50 marriage.”

What’s the spark that keeps you together and keeps the romance alive?
“He’s a funny, funny person. He makes me laugh. And when I’m stressed out for any reason, he can make a face or tell me something and it makes me laugh.”

“She’s beautiful. She is a wonderful person. She understands me. Everything she is sparks my soul every time I see her.”

Karla, what’s the most romantic gift Carlos has given you?
“I’m not really into fancy material presents. I like something original with more meaning than just the item itself. I like useful things. [He wanted] to buy me a diamond necklace or something and I had to educate him that that’s not really my thing.”

What advice about love, romance and relationship have you given your children?
Carlos calls their 15-year old son, David, into the kitchen to answer this question. “He tells me to be respectful to women. Don’t be pushy. Don’t go beyond the boundaries. Don’t disrespect yourself or your lady.”

Darin and Mercedes Branch
Darin, who is white, was raised in Houston and moved to the south side of Richmond in 1998. Mercedes, who is black, is a native of Richmond. The couple (pictured inset, on cover) has been married for seven years and now live in Chesterfield County with their two daughters and son. They own Perception Salon and Spa in Carytown and Darin also is president of Whitewood Solutions, a tax resolution business.

How did you meet?
We met when Darin was a sales manager at a local car dealership. Mercedes was working there as a temporary receptionist before moving to Bowie, Md.

What first attracted you to each other?
“Obviously, looks played a part for both of us,” Mercedes said as she laughed. “The confidence Darin had while selling cars and handling clients made him very attractive to me.”

Darin said he found Mercedes’ “warm personality extremely attractive. We started out as friends as both of us were recently out of relationships. We became close friends with conversations during work and eventually having a friendly relationship after work, which turned into more after Mercedes moved to Maryland.” For about four months, they had a weekend romance. They took turns driving back and forth so they could spend time together. They eventually moved in together here in Virginia.

Along the way, they discovered they each wanted to eventually start and own a business.

“We shared the same dreams of owning a salon and spa. Mercedes did nails and my mother does hair. That dream became reality in 2007 when we opened Perception Salon and Spa.”

Were there any challenges in the early years of your marriage?
“Well, Darin is a Scorpio and he was a little jealous in the early years,” Mercedes said. “He always said that being white and dating a beautiful black woman makes it hard on a white boy since he seemed to always be tested in public.”

What’s the spark that keeps you together and keeps the romance alive?
The couple agree, “We are friends first and that keeps the relationship strong.”

As far as romance goes, they make time to do special things. And Mercedes’ father, a former coach at Armstrong High School, often offers to help. “We are lucky enough to have Coach Samuels who takes the kids every other weekend which allows us to have a date night and a couple’s weekend twice a month,” said Darin, age 31.

Mercedes, what’s the most romantic gift Darin has given you?
“Darin has given me lots of gifts over the years and vice versa from trips to jewelry, but our most precious gifts are our children.”

What advice about love, romance and relationship will you give your children?
“I would have to say to be sure that you find someone who is your friend first and then build on that because if someone can’t respect you as a friend they will never respect you as a lover and it will never last,” said Mercedes, age 33. “At the end of the day, ‘The couple that prays together stays together.’”

This story is part of the Virginia Tapestry: Reflecting Our Rich Diversity series produced by In Your Shoes Media.


Community

Agencies combine on new entry point to Chickahominy


Canoeing and kayaking enthusiasts soon will have a new access point to the Chickahominy River. VDOT, the James River Association and Henrico County Parks and Recreation are teaming up to establish a new site in Eastern Henrico.

The James River Association negotiated the deal with VDOT to procure official access to the area located just east of I-295 on North Airport Road in Sandston. The site includes a park-and-ride commuter lot bordering the Chickahominy River and has been an unofficial launch site used by paddlers for years. > Read more.

Equestrian clinic planned July 7-8 in Henrico

Henrico equestrians interested in deepening the bond between themselves and their horses have the opportunity to attend a two day clinic, held at Steppin’ High Stables on July 7-8 from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. The clinic, “Become Partners with your Horse,” will be taught by multiple world champion equestrienne Terry Preiser and will focus on how riders and horses can work together to achieve more. > Read more.

Henrico school bus driver honored

The Henrico-based Hephaestus Society recently awarded its first annual community heroes award (the Hephaestus Award) to Hicham Elgharouch (pictured, center) for what it termed his "selfless acts of caring" in his duties as a Henrico County Public Schools bus driver. Henrico County Director of Pupil Transportation Josh Davis, joined Hephaestus Society President Travis Gardner, in presenting the award and an accompanying $1,500 check to Elgharouch last month.

Elgharouch was selected for his clear and demonstrated patience and for his infectious positive attitude, according to the society. > Read more.

Page 1 of 113 pages  1 2 3 >  Last ›

Entertainment

Weekend Top 10


Grab the kids and check out these fun family-friendly events taking place this weekend! Speed over to the Henrico Theatre for the film “Turbo” or watch “Dumbo” under the stars at Clarke-Palmore House Museum. Little ones can meet Thomas the Tank Engine at CMOR-Central or play at the Eastern Henrico Recreation Center. For all our top picks this weekend, click here! > Read more.

Weekend Top 10


Don’t party too hard on the Fourth because a whole weekend of fun events await! Enjoy a classy date night without the kids at James River Cellars Winery’s second annual Smoke and Vine Festival. Another date night option is at the Richmond Funny Bone, where comedian April Macie will perform all weekend. The kids have their own options this weekend as well. Choose from storytime at Tuckahoe and Twin Hickory libraries or family-oriented karaoke at Aunt Sarah’s Pancake House – I hear they have hits from Disney’s “Frozen.” For all our top picks this weekend, click here! > Read more.

Restaurant watch

Find out how your favorite dining establishments fared during their most recent inspections by the Virginia Department of Health. > Read more.

Page 1 of 88 pages  1 2 3 >  Last ›







 

Reader Survey | Advertising | Email updates

Classifieds

SAVE on Cable TV-Internet-Digital Phone. Packages start at $89.99/mo (for 12 months.) Options from ALL major service providers. Call Acceller today to learn more! CALL 1-888-686-5081.
Full text

Place an Ad | More Classifieds

Calendar

Create an animated Doodlebot to do your doodling for you at 3:30 p.m. at Varina Library, 2001 Library Rd. For ages 10-18. Registration is required. For details, call 290-9800 or… Full text

Your weather just got better.

Henricopedia

Henrico's Top Teachers